November 24, 2008
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far fetched
i have thought much as of late about the entirety of this journey the rivers gorges valleys & small dry tributaries in my ever evolving soulscape i have quietly wondered if death has finally come to claim me or if it's just part of my nurturing process a gentle washing or agitation cycle before another rebirth as well i have recounted the blessings curses & great mystery of glimpsing soul's histories of course it is not by my choice in these many instances i barely knew such things existed & doubted them at first i once asked the gift be taken back but almost perished for my technicolored world turned black emotionless & singed around the edges with regret such insight is far fetched & deemed almost as worthless in these days of technical progress & entertainment specials
i've come upon a personal time of revolution & deep questioning or a realization apex not so long ago i felt it was an attack or blasphemy the message was in the least quizzical when asked to redefine & re find my family when i was at the table returning thanks for them now i understand the pain & the mayhem of such a deep rooted extraction before the addition things work like that give & get attention to detail & listening is a must by this simple formula life almost lives itself
perhaps my methods of communication have been lacking too ancient or too progressive or interpreted as eccentric putting heartbeats into concrete teaching black cats & white rabbits to dance living with dove's as house guests honoring ghostly apparitions left on the hall wall by jasmine on fire or having stones that converse laugh & smile was not to your liking or was somehow threatening or perhaps living under the sign of the cross or the nail protruding from my front door was nauseating or embarrassing at this juncture of development for after all some hog the bread abuse the altar wine & abscond with the pitiful tithes while smiling
now thanks to your perpetual hedging i am at an important impasse & questioning my life's true work day to day living on the outskirts of time near heaven's thin borderlines where i have a second home determination to expose precious gold in dirt encrusted human geodes is fading because i myself am just a mere cinder left from a once brilliant star tho one determined to make her last sparks count sometimes i long to be back in the days when i danced on the edges of thought earthbound & giddy changing vignettes & room scapes designing with furniture fabric lighting & drapes instead of dreams & hunches results were so immediate & tangible then when bringing a vision into being
i had a deep umption to repay in kindness & help stamp out spirit blindness it had been done for me maybe i'm just a leper the One of ten or the prostitute returning again after all these centuries for what a shock to my systems it was when i was called to assist some as unlikely as myself find their way to the magic place inside themselves & outer space where our creator adorned in all his many colors & facets resides so in the end a beautiful story could be properly & finally exacted from what appears to be a mess
please believe this is not an amputation from my past nor from living in love's gentle massaging grasp not a chance of that for kindness is my mantra however an adjustment is required for my physical survival & soul's advancement like it or not i am where i've been & was asked to keep details of it even tho if flies in face of furrowed frowns scowls & is deemed poor reasoning by rigid religion's bitter seasonings i will not be as quite as a church mouse for in my make up i am lynx & lioness
the spirit's many revelations seldom if ever repeat themselves nor come in full force while inside boxes or rectangles of wood or stone the real action & interaction is out in creation it is silly to suppose for a moment His magnanimous persona & emotion could teach or reveal authenticity inside constraining places where myths have been made & thus perpetuated taking free men & minds as slaves while they pay big prices for whitewashed understanding
i gave my word i would give my word as foreign as it may be for whatever reason my source of all things deems fit
bless our nemeses
where would we be
without their input
or friction
ps
Martha Stewart eat your heart out
blessings beck
gmdO
art by me word /seed of creation
Comments (6)
There are words and paintings . This last one expresses well the sensuality and also the one in your previous post .
Love
Michel
being up against what it as it sounds as if you are, is a challenge you have faced before.....yet it makes it no less this time. Even giving over to -for what else can you do these events- makes the moment most sublime as you are facing what others fear but with a quietude. you are in new days where the dancing as you say does not bring the visions so immediate, and so these are the waiting times for you, resting with what is times. It takes a lioness to face them -g
you sound down today too. hope you are feeling better.
The only God there is (as far as you're concerned) is the one living inside of you. With everyone else, you have to try and guess if they have any aspect of God in them. You'd think your God would know, and probably he does, but he's not telling in any definitive manner. All we have is what he gives us, and what others give us, godly and otherwise. My faith-- "no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should"
i know you are much, much deeper than I will ever be and I appreciate reading these very fluid and powerful thoughts. I can only say that I wish you well.
I also thank you for visiting my humble Xanga site and leaving sush interesting comments. I know you are busy and there are many other sites out there--so thanks.
blessings
frank
I sure do hope that death isn't going to claim you any time soon.
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